Sunday, June 7, 2009

It's Worse Than You Think.

I am so tired of feeling sick all day long.
I constantly feel like I am going to throw up, or I am throwing up, or at least dry heaving.
FUN.

Everyone knows about morning sickness. But no one told me how bad it could be.
This how my day goes: Wake up, roll over and eat some crackers before I even think of raising my head from the pillow. Get up, go straight to the kitchen and eat something usually paired with yogurt to help my stomach calm down. Make my pregnancy tea. And drink a shot of ginger brew. Take vitamins in the middle of meal to make sure not to get more nauseous. Go lay down in bed with my "throw up" bowl and wait.

Then force my way through the rest of the day feeling extremely nauseous. Sucking on lemons, eating a small meal every two hours with some protein, eyeing the nearest receptacles in case of emergency.

Fun, I know.

People have been asking me a lot lately...."How are you feeling?" My answer is always, "Horrible." And I am thinking in my head: In fact I feel really bad right now, but go ahead, it's okay, touch my stomach, tell me about all the great babies in your life and all the great baby paraphernalia you know of and ask me if its a boy or a girl. I will grin and try not to look to queasy.

I really do want to hear all those things from people. I just really don't want to puke on them and that is hard work.

My midwives and everyone I talk to keep telling me that once I am in my second trimester things will get better and the "good" hormones will kick in and I will feel fantastic. And to keep up the ginger and the eating small meals etc.

Well, I've been in my second trimester for over a week now. No signs of feeling better. It's hard to write this. Reading and writing even make me nauseous.

I just want to enjoy my body again! I never knew how good I had it, feeling well everyday. I want to enjoy food again! And not have to consider everything I am eating as something that might be coming back up. Once it comes back up, its a little scarring, for example, bananas are now so unappealing to me.

Please Lord! Let me get the "good" hormones really soon.


PS: Photos found in local antique store. Love it.

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